I don’t know what to say, but I care about you.
You don’t have to try to fix it, and instead of saying, “I know exactly how you feel,” an ill person would love it if you would just admit, “I don’t have any idea what you are going through, but I am here if you need to vent.”
Sometimes we just need one person who will listen and then we can move on to other topics.
If you need to cry, I’ve got plenty of tissues.
Every now and then we just need a good cry. Between the emotions certain medications cause, plus the stress on our marriages, careers and more, we occasionally need to cry.
Instead of being one more person who says, “Don’t cry,” tell your friend you will sit with her while she cries. It is an intimate gift that only true friends will offer.
I’m bringing dinner Thursday. Can you eat lasagna or chicken?
People who are chronically ill rarely have anyone bring them a meal or take their kids for a play date. Since moms and dads with illness do their best to keep up with life, they are seen out and about and they “look just fine.” But you may never know how much they suffer silently in their home.
A meal for the family or babysitting the kids so parents can have a date night is a great way to provide support.
I am going to the store tomorrow. What can I get for you?
If you are running some errands, let your friend know in advance so he or she can write a short list. Being able to pick up heavy things can also be helpful, like a gallon of milk or laundry detergent. Bring them into the house and ask if you can put them away.
You are going through so much, yet you still have such joy. How do you do that?
If you see a friend who is coping well with his or her physical limitations, ask yourself what you could learn.
Rather than saying, “Thank goodness that isn’t me; I could never do that,” ask them what motivates them when they are in pain, or how they prioritize to make the most of limited energy. Where do they find hope when the circumstances look bleak?
Those who live with illness learn a lot about the ups and down in life and would love the opportunity to share the wisdom they have discovered.
- Lisa Copen, “Talking to someone with a chronic illness”
On the evening before the school opened in 2008, four men paid her a visit.
“They said, ‘This is your last chance … to change this school into a boys’ school, because the backbone of Afghanistan is our boys,’ ” Jan recalled.
“I just turned around and I told them, ‘Excuse me. The women are the eyesight of Afghanistan, and unfortunately you all are blind. And I really want to give you some sight.’ “
Jan has not seen the men since.
“You can’t be afraid of people,” she said. “You have to be able to say ‘no.’ Maybe because I’m old, the men are kind of scared of me, and they don’t argue with me.”
| — |
Razia Jan, a true hero and woman of valor. The article begins like this:
|
I wonder if black people would be still in the fields picking cotton today if the 13th Amendment — the one abolishing slavery — was placed on the ballot back in 1865.
I wonder if Hillary Clinton would be at home baking cookies instead of serving as secretary of state if women’s suffrage was put to a vote back in 1919.
In other words, I wonder just how far along we would be as a society if the oppressive majority held all of the legislative and judicial power over the oppressed minority, essentially yanking the teeth out of Congress and the Supreme Court.
I’m sure you’ve heard a lot about the gay agenda, but may not know what’s in it. Here’s what you do: Download a copy of the United States Constitution, read it. Everything the LGBT community wants is in there.
Sounds like an oversimplification?
It’s not.
